Table of contents:
- 1. Understand why you are in the friend zone
- 2. Evaluate what your chances are
- 3. Show your best
- 4. Flirt
- 5. Change the activities to do together
- 6. Be independent
- 7. Declare yourself and come out with your head held high
Leaving the friendzone is possible: we give you step by step the strategies to be implemented to transform a friendship into a relationship
It can be a historical friend or the boy met a few months ago. You begin to be physically attracted to him and find that you have feelings that go far beyond just friendship.
This relational limbo called the friendzone for you begins to become an increasingly narrow and uncomfortable place, until the idea of getting out of it becomes an urgent necessity.
Yes, but something stops you: if he doesn't feel the same things, by declaring yourself you risk losing both the eventual idyllic relationship that you are already imagining and the friendship you really care a lot about.
The fact that this is a classic situation does not make it any easier to solve.
What to do? Here are some tips with which we try to guide you, step by step, out of the friend zone. (If the conditions are there, it is an infallible path).
1. Understand why you are in the friend zone
Analyzing the reasons why you ended up in this relationship waiting room is the first step in identifying the action plan to follow.
If you have never even shown your feelings at all, for example, your friend may be convinced that you don't like him.
If, on the other hand, the two of you live almost in symbiosis and he talks to you about everything, including his conquests, then the image he has of you perhaps completely lacks romantic and / or sexual connotations.
Do you trust each other but neither of you has ever committed to a serious relationship? In this case, he may not want to push your relationship any further because he considers it too important.
2. Evaluate what your chances are
Before jumping out of the friend zone, make sure there is no vacuum around.
Of course, at this moment you want nothing more than to change the type of relationship you have with him, in order not to risk being too disappointed, however, first dwell on the actual possibilities you have of succeeding.
Timing, first of all, is a crucial element: if your friend has just hooked up with a girl he is clearly in love with, the chances of your courage in declaring yourself rewarded are really low, you might want to wait.
Another question to ask is: are you his type? You have a determined and gritty character, but has he only ever dated shy, taciturn and accommodating girls?
In this case, unless you want to upset your personality, you'd better stay friends.
Finally, do not forget to study the signals that he, consciously and unconsciously, sends you: if he makes appreciation towards you, continually seeks physical contact and has only eyes for you, then the game is done.
If, on the other hand, you seem to be light years away from this description, a lot of work awaits you before your coming out.
3. Show your best
What you want is that he is attracted to you, temperamentally, but also physically.
Probably if you are friends it is because you already have a good understanding and affinity, so you can focus on the physical aspect.
If your friend has seen you in the worst conditions, including hair pads, pijama-shirts and animal-shaped slippers, now is the time to put an end to this situation.
In short, "If you feel comfortable, you'll never get the… man": to get what you want, you are not allowed to stay in relaxation mode.
Maybe what separates you from turning your friend into your boyfriend is just a little bit of physical alchemy.
So do some sport, show up with outfits you've never seen you wear and don't be afraid to be sexier than ever.
Ok, now that you understand the reasons why you are in the fateful friendzone, you have decided that there are the conditions to get out of it and you are so in the shot that everyone turns to look at you, you just have to move on to the next step: build a first bridge between friendship and love.
This bridge is called flirting, and it has the advantage of moving you out of your hated limbo without exposing yourself excessively.
What you need to do is try to seduce your friend by avoiding making this attempt too obvious.
Look at him differently, smile at him, make jokes about his appearance, take his hand; in other words, show him that you are attracted to him but by passing him off as a game. And above all, have fun doing it.
5. Change the activities to do together
You've known each other for a lifetime and you always go out in a group, go to the same pub and maybe order the same cocktail on time.
Or you have recently been dating but your appointments consist of going for a run together, meeting for coffee or sharing lunch with your colleagues.
Here, if you continue like this, get used to the role of friends because you will cover it for life.
What you have to do to get out of the friendzone is to press the rewind button of your friendship and make sure that he gets to know you, all over again, in a totally different light.
So break your routine of friends and propose new activities: go to dinner in a romantic place, watch a movie at the cinema and, why not, plan a trip together.
6. Be independent
For your friend to start considering you differently, they need to be intrigued by you.
If he believes he knows you 100% and is omnipresent in your life, his interest in you will remain limited to friendship.
If, on the other hand, he understands that you have many other passions, you hang out with different people and you have aspects yet to be discovered, he will automatically be more attracted to you.
So be active, keep busy and keep a certain amount of mystery.
7. Declare yourself and come out with your head held high
Now that you have followed all the steps to get out of the detestable friendzone, you are missing the last and final move: to tell the truth about your feelings.
The ideal would be to do it after creating a certain intimate relationship, perhaps after a first kiss.
Or, if you're a real strategist, you might even be able to get him to go to confession first.
In any case, the important thing is that when you decide to declare yourself, you do it in the most relaxed and spontaneous way possible.
Optimistically, your friend may not have waited for anything else, so much so that you will find him at your feet, excited to start a romantic relationship with you.
But if he does not reciprocate, you will still have lifted a burden and you will have to be more proud than ever of your courage.
Faced with this eventuality, it will be up to you to decide, perhaps after a pause for reflection, whether to continue the friendship or not.