Table of contents:
- The careless: I didn't do it on purpose
- The melodramatic: I've been crying for weeks
- The altruist: I thought I didn't deserve you
- The repentant: now I have changed
- The meditative: I needed some time to understand
- The purposeful: I need a woman like you to be better
- The desperate: I realized that being alone sucks
- The hypocrite: we can't throw it all away
- The fearful: I was afraid
- The selfish: me, me, me, me
Exes all come back sooner or later, and often they do it with bad excuses: we have collected the worst and explain which you shouldn't believe
Exes always come back sooner or later and when they do they have no shame.
There is a song that summarizes exactly the mood one feels when an ex after months of inaction comes back and claims to have you back as if nothing had happened: "Smile", by Lilly Allen, in which poor Lilly is dumped by her boyfriend goes through terrible months and then when he finally manages to get out of the tunnel he catches him and shows up again and demands to have her back. At that point she can't stop laughing and replies that she is doing it only because she feels lonely.
Because the truth is this - in addition to those who are truly repentant and enlightened, there are also those who return only out of boredom or fear, and in those cases the excuses are always the same.
We've collected the worst ones around.
The careless: I didn't do it on purpose
In the sense that he gave up without thinking about it? Maybe he didn't know what he was doing because an alien took over his mind and forced him to do things against his will. There was an evil force whispering to him to leave you and he listened to it without knowing exactly what he was doing.
Men who claim not to have done it on purpose have evidently not yet understood the direct relationship between cause and effect, between action and responsibility, and should be sent back to kindergarten by the teacher.
The melodramatic: I've been crying for weeks
He wants to make you feel sorry for him, to show his fragile side and hopes to make you think: "Poor thing, he's sensitive, if he cries maybe he really loves me."
But where have the real strong men gone? Those who take life by the horns? Do like Lilly Allen and smile as you offer him handkerchiefs.
The altruist: I thought I didn't deserve you
He was doing it for you, and he tries to win you back by leveraging your low self-esteem, he believes that by telling you that you are too much for him you will feel important and come back happy and flattered.
We should simply confirm his statement and remind him that yes, you are too much for him, actually he was right, he does not deserve you at all, so goodbye.
The repentant: now I have changed
He swears and perjures that he is a new person, completely changed. What you saw was his different side, his sick side, the evil twin of the iron mask, the one who will never come back and now he can't wait to show you who he really is.
The problem is that his pathology has a name and it is called bipolarity, run away as far as possible and know that men never, ever change.
The meditative: I needed some time to understand
Poor thing, he thought there was no future for you, but he needed time to think about it and to understand what terrible mistake he was making, in the meantime, however, he gave you the worst months of your life and he needed to sleep with. a colleague of hers, with her neighbor and with her little brother's babysitter. But all this brought him back to you, isn't it wonderful?
Send it back right away.
The purposeful: I need a woman like you to be better
He needed to explore the world, to make mistakes and to make mistakes. He no longer knew who he was and your love certainly could not save him from himself, for this reason he was forced to leave you but in the past months to make mistakes and hit rock bottom he understood that without you he is a worse person.
Too bad you have understood that you are a better person without him, differences of point of view.
The desperate: I realized that being alone sucks
This is definitely one of the worst excuses, he believes that you too are feeling terribly lonely and that two loneliness are better than one. He is practically trying to recover you because in the meantime he hasn't found better and because he is unable to be alone, is there anything worse in the world?
You definitely deserve something better, enjoy the satisfaction of seeing it crawl and go on your way.
The hypocrite: we can't throw it all away
A big and bright question mark will appear on your face, you can breathe, count to ten, buy ten meditation lessons online and then point out that he left you and therefore you cannot understand why he is now pointing a finger at you. begging you not to throw your relationship away.
It seems clear to you that your relationship has long been gone and that he was the one who destroyed it.
The fearful: I was afraid
This will make you understand that when there is a problem he will be able to face it with courage and hard-nosed, at best he will cry. In short, no one wants a coward next to them, not even you and it doesn't work even if they try to turn the omelette around saying that they were not afraid of your relationship but of the part of him that you showed him every day, he did not want to remember the horrible man that he had become.
The selfish: me, me, me, me
In all his attempts to reconnect with you, he considers only one point of view, his own. It doesn't even take into consideration that you may have passed over, dating other men, or forgetting about it. His is a long monologue with himself in a desperate attempt to fuel his ego with new energy again.
You can try to point out that he is already engaged, to himself, and it seems to you that his relationship is fine as it is.